the most boring blog

blnkety blnk bl*nk!

2010-10-06T14:00:00.002-09:00

It's really hard to live up to the status of "most boring" blog. Until now, I always was mildly amused by the absurdity I had just put on the internet. However, I just now realized that I had fulfilled the ideal of "most boring" by not writing ANYTHING!

Life's a 'Vich

2009-06-26T10:02:00.002-09:00

Think of all the stress in the world...think about it like that white on white painting by Malevich. Then, go buy a blow up world (or a copy of White on White by Malevich). Then punch the world with a big, solid punch, in order to flatten it and thus symbolically get rid of the stress in the world... or it might symbolically represent destroying the world with a large fist from the sky, which might scare you and latently cause you more stress (so, I would actually recommend going with the Malevich painting and just drawing something worthwhile on it).

faux REALZ

2008-12-21T22:21:00.003-09:00

I am constantly catching myself being quite arrogant, or haughty, just like you. I think most people can say with honesty that they, too can be quite arrogant. Lyrical Gangstas are known for being REALLY arrogant.
I often wondered if every time they said, "shoot, daawg" in a song, if it meant that they were lyrically shooting someone (or their lame fighting dog). I suppose that would make them passive-aggressive as well. On the bright side, no one could ever say, "why don't you just come out and say it!!!" It would be totally rad, though if every time a rapping dog said, "thro' mee a BOHNE!!!" they got a bone, because, if you didn't know this already, dogs luuuv bones...and some dogs starve for them, like in Romania and Ukraigneh. (Some countries eat dogs, too, if you didn't know that either.)

Megatight RAP:

EAt dawwwg! Kut me sum slack!
Kuzz if you keep wit it,
I'll b. on yo' back
An' then I will cack juss to make you madd
whilst thou eatest chili in yo' grampah'z plaidd?
WUTT? you say; that bee stingin' yo' ear?
well I gottsomemore fo' ya'll to hear...
But I gots a prob wit bein' too P.-A.
So I juss say to you: Have a nice day!
Peace!

suppatime

2008-11-10T19:54:00.004-09:00

There are all kinds of things made for dinner. Pizza is good for you and is good. Play-doh is not good for food. Chicken can be good for you, but if you eat the gizzard you need to tell the chicken a joke while he's eating (before you kill him) so that he can barf up all the glass he swallowed to munch up his food... but if he is eating pizza, you can let him enjoy it first because it is soooo good.

close, but no cigar (don't smoke)

2008-11-10T19:45:00.002-09:00

I fool everyone--I'm serious. I think everyone looks at me and says, "hey, that is one guy who is something", but I am really something else.

,but

2008-11-10T19:43:00.003-09:00

The sun was shining today like a fireball...but the clouds were covering it. I actually like the rain; to me it...wait a second, I think I already wrote about this :(

the most important thing

2008-11-04T22:27:00.001-09:00

http://www.hollywoodsign.org/247.html

latent function

2008-11-04T21:53:00.005-09:00

no comment

ban together

2008-11-04T20:27:00.001-09:00

In these times that try mens' souls we need to ban together. And I mean BAN it!

creird and wazy

2008-11-01T21:54:00.003-09:00

People think I'm crazy because I'm weird. I say, "everybody's weird." People who smoke are weird AND crazy; but I don't smoke. Now smoking is dangerous and dandy. When I say dangerous I am referring to one's health and it negatively affecting them; when I say dandy...I don't really know why I said that, to tell you the truth, but the dangerous part really shows that to take up smoking would really show lack of consciousness (and when I say that, I mean you're crazy).

prez

2008-10-26T19:02:00.005-09:00

Oh, My Dog

2008-10-26T18:48:00.002-09:00

Here is an easy way of telling if you are ugly or not: go to a sink in a public bathroom and pretend to wash your hands until someone comes to the sink next to you; look deeply into the mirror at yourself, so you memorize what you look like real good; when someone arrives, shift your gaze onto their mirror and stare deeply at them to memorize what they look like; eventually, you will see that everyone has a lot of nooks and crannies, except for good looking people.

What

2008-10-26T18:42:00.002-09:00

Some people really want to be skinny, like a stick. I keep on tellin' them that sticks have no personality. Think about this: who was the last skinny person you knew who had a personality--Dick Van Dyke? I don't even think you knew him

the Chameleon

2008-09-02T21:02:00.002-09:00

I often wish I were a chameleon: the lizard with the ability to change color and shape. Well, maybe I am glad I'm not a lizard, but I would like to be able to change color nonetheless. Then, I would like to be color blind as well, so that I could not even tell what color I was going to be. Then my life would be an adventure.
Just goes to show that you cannot plan out the future too far in advance.

Like a Lion On Wheels

2008-09-02T20:34:00.002-09:00

I so got a thorn in my tire today and then I had to buy some inner tubes. What in the world possessed someone to think that biking to work was cheap? I am almost under the impression that it would be much cheaper to push your car to work than to ride your bike...
No, no--dumb idea; sorry.

Need a Little Time...

2008-09-02T20:29:00.002-09:00

This morning, I woke up at 3am. Which reminded me of that song, "bab-ay-hay! Wellit's3-A-M I muss be lonlay-hay..." I wonder why he didn't just say what he was thinking, like, "I must be sleepay-hay."
Still, I guess I was lonely because no one was awake except for the people in their cars.
So, long story short, I drank some coffee.

Swing Vote

2008-09-02T20:28:00.000-09:00

I am definitely against the swing vote.

Health Conscious

2008-08-23T21:39:00.003-09:00

Chicken nuggets are NOT healthy for you, contrary to popular belief. Just kidding. (I mean about the 'contrary to popular belief'). Although kids can eat them and they seem to do just fine.

Weather

2008-08-23T21:27:00.003-09:00

This summer has been like, hot, then kind of cool, but only to get hot again. Now, it is hot, but only kind of. We all probably know the song, "Rain, Rain, Go Away", but I sure wish that we could get some even though I have to ride my bike to work. I would probably just wear a poncho, anyway. So, God can we get some rain?

I'll sleep when I'm dead/ weekend warrior/ long week

2008-08-23T21:21:00.003-09:00

Man, this week has sure been like a week and a half. I was tired on Monday and ready for the weekend by then. I guess I am a weekend warrior. But I'll sleep when I'm dead.